The best kind of gift
Sharing gratitude when you're networking (and when you're not!)
There is no better feeling than giving the right gift. My favorite is when the gift is unexpected and thoughtful in a way that is almost confusing (but in a delightful way) for the recipient. I read once that you should aim to give what a person does not fully feel they deserve, but that does not overstretch the point.
The full genius of gifting is about getting beyond the boundaries of your own needs; it means understanding another and another’s life. It disarms and moves and empowers all at once. To be grateful is a good feeling. To share that gratitude with someone else is a better one.
This is the way you can approach networking too. When you show up to give, rather than to get, reaching out will never feel gross or salesy or inauthentic ever again.
Real networking is about finding ways to make other people more successful. It's about working hard to give more than you get.
This takes longer, but it is worth it to be as thoughtful as possible when you are connecting with someone, especially a stranger.
There are many different types of gifts you can send when you’re reaching out. Here are five of my favorites:
An extremely specific compliment
An extremely specific recommendation (this could be a lot of things, see below)
A connection to someone you know
A skill or perspective you have that could help them
A really good question
If you're looking to grow or strengthen your network, this will have the biggest impact for SURE. If you do anything well, do this.
Now you can peek into my inbox for 11 examples of real gifts I’ve sent in reach outs from the past month, including at least one of each type from the list above:
These are personal and a little vulnerable so I’d appreciate your thoughts (or at least some likes on this post sheesh) if you find this good omen useful.