There is power in not being afraid

Marc Typo on seeking connections outside of your comfort zone

Welcome to The Net, an interview collection about how connections, networking, and good omens have enhanced the lives of the most interesting and creative among us.

Today’s guest is one of the most thoughtful people I’ve had the delight of meeting this year. He is the kind of person who I imagine thinks deeply about the world while looking out the window with a steaming cup of apple cider. He is the kind of person I think I’d gain wisdom from on just about every subject.

He writes Raising Myles, a collection of letters to his son as he grows. They are a truly beautiful window into the world of parenthood and have been a great source of joy for me as I step into this new chapter at TRULY any moment now (re Whoops I’m Pregnant)

I’m in bold and Marc is in not bold.

I’m pleased to introduce you to

Marc Typo

, in his own words:

Marc Typo. What does connection mean to you?

I believe we weren't made to be alone, we are supposed to be in community connection with other people. I think being with people just makes life all the more enjoyable, especially when it comes to marriage, love and now raising a child.

Life is better with other people. You know, everything I do, mostly, I really enjoy doing other people. I really am an extrovert at heart.

Connection forces me to be more empathetic, you know, and introduces me to a whole view that I'm not really used to. For that reason I often seek connection outside of my comfort zone… Sometimes our relationships with people run this like an algorithm, everyone looks like us, comes from the same communities, has the same political backgrounds, and we don't venture out, you know. I try to live a life where I can get to know different people because that's how I learn– through others experiences.

How do you go about seeking connection with people who are different from you?

I ask lots of questions. For me it feels easy, because people like to talk about themselves and I like to listen. In that way, we kind of find commonalities, but I think you just have to be open, which is really true about opportunities in life anywhere.

I attend a national group called f3. It's a workout group for men. They meet at 5:30 in the morning and work out 45 minutes, and a friend invited me and I when I got there, I was only black guy there, you know, and I'm kind of used to that, but being in that group for the past month has helped me connect with so many other men. Just being out there, working out before the sun is up in the heat or the cold, like, that's a different kind of connection you’re making with people there, you know? And it gets to be just that. They're not coming to my house. We're not gonna have Thanksgiving together, but I'm getting a lot just from being there, because I feel like part of something– belonging– even with people who I feel so different from.

You strike me as a person who loves connecting but maybe isn’t so hot on networking. Is that correct?

In this season of my life, the word networking just feels like a chore right now. It feels like a LinkedIn game where everyone is just trying to figure out as quickly as possible, “what can you do for me, what can I get from you?” I'm just tired, you know. I don't want more work to do, because I have enough work already so yeah I feel like I’ve really backed off of networking…

It's so interesting. I think about the fact that I used to reach out to a new person every day– even like thinking about it– I'm like, oh my god, I’m tired. I'm so happy that I did it and it taught me a lot. But I think it's so natural for networking to be really seasonal. And not something enough people talk about. Right now I’m focused on connections that will serve me in the long term… like who do I actually want a great connection with in the next 5 years– maybe they're work related, and maybe they're not work related– but I’m not focused on seeking immediate gratification from networking.

I want to get your take on asking. I think most people who have found any level of success in their career, have to face asking for what they want, and being really honest and vulnerable and brave in that. Something tells me you’re very good at that.

I abide by this idea that what is for me can't miss me. I really believe that there's enough for us to go around. And sometimes people have certain things because they're meant to give it away, you know. If I want something, and you have it, I believe I'm supposed to have it too because you have it to give it to me, you know?

So if I do not ask for what I want, then what you have that's meant to be given can be given. And most times, people really do want to give, and as a result, I have to help them by asking them, you know, which is very contrary to what society says.

I also believe in shooting my shot. I'm going to ask and I've always been like that. When I got into grad school and I couldn't afford it, I remember emailing random companies to ask for help. It didn't work, but I'm glad I tried. In those situations, if I lose, I lose nothing because the worst you could tell me is no, right?

It’s easier said than done because people are always afraid, but there is power in not being afraid. I have enough evidence in my life to make me believe that people want to support other people. And if we don't ask, we miss out on opportunities like this, to have conversations and to connect.

That is such a beautiful and different take on something I feel like I’ve heard versions of before. Curious, what have you learned from the times you asked and got rejected? What happened when you sent those emails and it didn’t work?

It ended up just being a great learning experience for me, nothing more, nothing less. But those experiences really shape us. I feel like no one talks about their failures enough. Most of everything we see on social media is a success or image of success.

I learned that our stories, especially stories about failure, help people get free. What I learned from those failed emails was that talking about it is just another opportunity for me to connect with the right people.

What made you decide to start Raising Myles?

I started writing these small notes on my phone. I created an email for him, something I encourage all parents to do, especially men. I started sending him pictures and videos and little sentences, but then I wanted to share the feelings and experiences I was going through.

I try to start the letter the same way because it keeps me focused. I feel like the more you grow and people find you, you can get an ego, so I try to ground myself in keeping it for him, to him as best as I can.

Writing to him is like trying to answer the question, how many different ways can I tell you I love you? Every letter is a revision or presentation of that through some kind of story or angle.

But it's also nice hearing people that receive that too, and relate. As a result people have shared some really intimate, real things that happen to them or their own lives with their fathers and families. What I’ve learned from writing is that none of us are going through it alone. It’s liberating because it connects us to each other and shows me that as special as we all are, we're not all that unique.

My substack is called the good omen because in the work I do, the interactions I have, the reach outs I send, the writing I publish– it is my hope that when people are on the receiving end, they feel like it's a good omen. But I also love hearing what a good omen means to others too. What does it mean to you?

I think a good omen is what it feels like to be really seen– like that feeling of reciprocation of what you are putting out there. A good omen is that moment of connection with someone where it feels like you’re really just enjoying the moment.

Love that. What is your biggest tactical piece of advice for someone trying to do something meaningful or worthwhile in life?

This is a poignant question for me right now… I am in the phase of attempting this myself.

I'm trying this program to learn to code, which is something very different and very scary. And I realized that I told myself a series of stories that had prevented me from doing this for a long time. I wasn't smart enough, you know, this is too hard, and it took me some time to realize this was just a mindset that is not serving me.

I know it's obvious, but it hit me recently that I actually can do this, you know.

My advice to people who are trying to do something similar is to just do it, because tomorrow isn't promised. My biggest fear is to be at a certain point in my life where I’m saying things like, “I wish I did X.” Even if I tried this and failed, I knew I gave it a chance though, you know, and I think, because I'm a dad now and trying to, like, think about, like, who I am as a father. I also want to embody that mindset for Myles too, so I'm going to try, and if it doesn't work out, it doesn't, but at least I tried.

I love that. Okay what are you desperate to recommend right now? A book, an activity, anything.

There's a writer who is also a dad who writes letters, but he lost his wife to cancer and it's really sad, but it's beautiful because it's a reminder to hold people that are here close. His name is

George Perrin MBE

and he writes s Substack called On Coping. When I read it, I’m reminded of how we should love people, because you never know.

That's beautiful. I can't wait to read it. Last question. If you could sail back in time to a moment in your past, just to experience it again. You can't change anything about it, but you can just go back and live a moment or a day over again, where would you choose to go?

That's a great question. I would go back to when I proposed Maya. It was like, in this really nice Airbnb, I got a chef, all the bells and whistles, and I was so nervous. I knew she would say yes, but I would really love to go back to remember what I said to her and just live in that moment again.

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And scene.

Thanks for reading. This conversation reminded me that even when my energy is low and “I don’t wanna,” asking meaningful questions, learning something new, and finding connection with a stranger like Marc is one of the best ways to spend 45 mins. Here’s to more opportunities to snatch us from our normal routines and shake us of our own ways of thinking in 2025.

Happy Holidays from Dot, seen here pleading with us to put this paper baby back in bassinet box.